b"FACILITATE POSITIVE EXCHANGES Women like to sort out their thoughts when communicating with them and tendtopouroutalitanyofgeneralgrievanceswhentheyrelatetheir concerns. Currently,amanneedsreassurancethathispartnerstilldeemshim worthy of taking care of things. Both should try to avoid feeling personally blamed when their partner is facing problems.When a man is troubled, he doesn't want his partner to worry about him, but likes to be told that the problem is easily within his abilities to be rectified due to an implied vote of confidence in his abilities.When a woman is troubled, she likes her partner to express concern for her, but doesn't want to be told the problem is easy to solve because of the implied dismissal of her concerns about it. A solution must be sought once his feelings have been fully listened to, a solution that is too quick justifies his abilities, but devalues his worries, a problemthatistoopersistentjustifieshisworries,butdevalueshis abilities.Men feel validated and gratified when left on their own to sort things out and feel undermined by sympathy or unsolicited help. Womenfeelvaluedandgratifiedwhentheyareofferedunsolicited sympathy or help and feel undermined when they are left on their own to sort things out.6.A mutual understanding: women periodically sink into depression when they feel it is time to cleanse and resolve themselves emotionally. Atthatpoint,theymaybecomecompletelynegativeintheiroutlook, dwelling on all the issues that are bothering them, including long-standing ones that will usually have been raised and dealt with before, and if they cannot find real issues to focus on, so they find something else to worry about.Theysuspendtheirnormalofferingnature,demandingtherightto express their feelings and not be left on their own, and if supported and given enough time to express and release their negative feelings, they will begin to feel happier again and regain their self-esteem. The slowness with which they sink into depression and later recover can be difficult for men to deal with. Germain Decelles175"