b"Chapter 9 THE CONFRONTATIONUnless you're a robot, it's almost inevitable that at some point you'll have to approachsomeoneaboutsomethingtheymighthavedoneintentionallyor unintentionally.Most people feel an intense discomfort in the act of confronting people, in order to discuss a problem and reach common ground.We hesitate to confront for many reasons:We hold painful memories of past confrontations that went wrong. We don't want to confront for fear of hurting or disappointing others. It's hard to be assertive in highly power-laden or political environments, like many of our workplaces. We find it difficult to control our emotions effectively when talking about something difficult because it induces fear in us. We guess, question, and doubt our motives for confrontation. We don't want to be perceived as malicious or demanding. We prefer this to resolve magically.However,themostimportantreasontoconfrontsomeoneispsychological because,youmatter,youropinionmatters,andhavingtheopportunityto express yourself is well worth a little discomfort for you and those around you.294Germain Decelles"